How to make your kids decisive when it counts

 This exercise will help you teach your child to create immediate decisiveness when it comes to either threatening or threatening stressful situations. 

 It’s called The Sleeve Catcher.

The Sleeve Catcher name is actually coined after a old Japanese law enforcement tool that the police used called the sodegarami, a spiked staff used to catch the kimono of a violent criminal. They'd catch the garment and force him to the ground in order to restrain them.

The Sleeve Catcher is an excellent exercise that helps your child create fast initiative and rapid, decisive decision-making, without telegraphing their mind or body.

First show them two steps. The first is simply have them begin in a natural standing position, and then quickly step forward and slightly off center-line. Without stopping their motion, they will turn 180 degrees facing opposite in which they were standing with their hands lifted slightly in front of them, as though placing the palms on a wall that’s close to them.

The second is a little more complicated, so don’t introduce it until the first movement is done successfully several dozen times. So we don’t get ahead of ourselves, I’ll introduce the second movement at the end of the exercise. 

Now, your role. Begin by extending your arm to hold your hand about three to four inches away from their shoulder sleeve. Use a parallel grab, in other words; prepare to grip their left shoulder sleeve using your right hand.

Here’s where it gets fun.

The moment the sense that you're about to grab their sleeve, I want them to one way or the other, in the manner you showed them.At the same time, they will be pushing you away, or they're moving the arm away. Don’t make this a martial arts, it’s not mean to be some type of karate block. What I ultimately want them to do is to move behind you, and stunning you at some level.

Whether they're coming through and they're using their shoulder or their elbow to hit you in the stomach, or they're moving the arm away in a parry-type mot, then moving behind you, makes no difference. The goal is to get behind you and place both hands on your back, before you grab their shirt and without losing balance (important).

If your child has some martial arts training, can they use their trained style of movement? Of course!  While this exercise isn't meant to be a self-defense technique, we can use this drill to support a skill set that your child is already developing.

Here’s the most important step to this exercise, pay attention. We don't want them winding up before going forward. We want them to recognize the very subtle indicators of your intention, and react. You must start this exercise slow and very gradually build up your speed.

It may be the sudden tightening of your shoulders, or the subtle movement in the hand, that they respond to. But the only direction that they can move is forward. They cannot pull back and then going forward, they need to advance forward into you and behind you quickly.

Hold your hand out, wait, wait, then grab! They should be able to eventually move quickly forward to one side or the other, fast like a cockroach, and end up right behind you. Or explode right into you with an elbow strike or shoulder bump, (martial arts comes in here too, but don’t make this exercise combative.) Train them to also move the arm, pass it and quickly move behind.

If your child doesn't do martial arts (yet), this is going to be an incredibly valuable exercise to work with them on. I would encourage that you do it no-less than 20 times, and at least two times a week. And have fun with it, make sure they look forward to doing it with you.

Also, have them hold their hand out and try to grab your sleeve while you quickly move your arm and advance forward.

Training our kids to make immediate, accurate decisions and move forward with them quickly is a critical life skill, let alone the personal protection benefits. Being able to respond without mental paralysis creates strong management and negotiation skills as a result of training decisive and fast decision making processes.

I hope you have enjoyed the Sleeve Catcher!

I’m looking forward to hearing your results and how you have used this amazing exercise.